


(held him captive in my kiss)

by bokeae



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Boats, Character Development, Dan can change between feminine and masculine, Dan legit couldn't care less, Greek Mythology - Freeform, M/M, Mermaids, Nymphs - Freeform, Phan - Freeform, Phan Angst, Phil has too much power, Sailor!Phil, Siren!Dan, Spirits, coward!phil, dan's also gay as fuck, dan's bitch but its ok, dan's sadistic, different lifetime, dryad, flirty!Phil bc ben said, i mean not that angsty, i swear it's cooler than the summary, kindaasshole!dan, mythical AU, mythical creature! dan, naiad, phil's gay as fuck, phil's scared of virtually everything, sadistic!dan, ships, slight gore, tbh Dan has no fucks to give, thats the word, why are all my chaptered phanfics so angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-08
Updated: 2017-02-23
Packaged: 2018-08-29 18:14:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 11,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8500144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bokeae/pseuds/bokeae
Summary: Dan's a sadistic siren with fingers tinted blue and Phil's a silent coward who fears bravery.





	1. bitter

**Author's Note:**

> Dan as a siren tho, imagine that.
> 
> also i seem to be writing smol chapters and long oneshots- idk i tried to make the chapters long but ugh i just can't. (but that means extra chapters idk we'll see i don't want to jinx myself)
> 
> also note, sirens can change between feminine and masculine depending on what their victim is attracted to (tbh not sure if its true but i just rly like that concept so don't come and be all 'no they can't, they're all women' sshsh) 
> 
> my tumblr is [@bokeae](http://bokeae.tumblr.com/) so hit me up!

Phil's lamp had burned his fingers eight times and he squeaked silently- he clamped a hand over his mouth because he shouldn't be making any noise.

He looked around the room, waiting for movement, waiting for Finley to come in and snatch the book out of his hands. But all he heard were the waves crashing silently onto the ship and the ocean.

He went back to his book and he shouldn't be reading it because he was more than a little terrified. And he could imagine Minotaurs tearing his flesh apart and gorgons freezing him with one ugly look.

And he really shouldn't have agreed to sailing to Greece.

"Look, we arna' doin much here." Finley said a night before, noticing Phil's ghostly look. "Jus' restocking on supplies an' sailing back. You donae' 'ven have to go outside. Jus' stay in the ship."

And Phil didn't understand much of what Finley said but he got the message and his tone was comforting.

Phil nodded because he didn't speak much and he was sure Finley thought he was mute. And maybe he was borderline mute, he liked to speak when absolutely necessary, like when the Captain decided to speak to him on rare occasions (Finley's mouth dropped open).

Phil turned back to his book, trying to avoid Medusa's drawn eyes. He flipped the page and started reading about Cyclops and Sphinxes.

Soon, his book was ripped out of his hands and Finley was lecturing him and Phil thought it was unfair because Finley didn't believe in these strange Greek creatures and it was easier for him to patronise Phil.

And Phil was too scared to do anything whatsoever and he wondered everyday why he was even here, on this ship that he didn't deserve to be on.

Maybe the Captain took pity on Phil, the orphan, when he was out selling fruits that lacked in freshness and his eyes had a permanent droop, out of exhaustion, out of terror.

And the Captain asked if he wanted to go on an adventure and he took Phil's silence as a yes. Phil was too scared to say no, to object and he should really work on not being a coward.

Finley liked to say that this adventure might help strengthen Phil and he meant it in a physical way because Phil was the scrawniest and he couldn't hold an anchor. But Phil took it in a mental way, maybe this could help him get over his fear of absolutely everything.

Jack liked to point out the positive bits.

"Hey, at least you're not in the orphanage anymore." Jack had said and Phil nodded,"You get cooked food here, a good view of the sunset- so what if a banshee kills you?"

But still, Phil liked hiding in terror, maybe it was a coping mechanism.

Finley gave him back the book and he felt more than sorry for Phil because fear chased after him and Phil's not a fast runner.

"Why're you so scared?" Finley asked, voice quiet and Phil shrugged but he knew the answer. Fear was a familiar feeling, he's felt it always. Maybe it wasn't a good feeling, it was the worst but it held him captive.

"Poor lad, too scared ta' 'ven talk." Finley tutted, "C'ptain made a mistake, pickin' you to come aboard." 

Finley wasn't trying to be mean, Phil got that, just, staring at the ground felt better than meeting his eyes and Finley was apologising for offending him.

"I didn't mean it like tha' jus..." He couldn't explain himself but that was ok, he was right. "I'm sorry."

Phil shook his head, as if to say it was ok. And he offered a meek smile and Finley told him a smile suited him.

Finley left and Phil was scared once more because everything around him was unfamiliar and maybe the orphanage was better than this.

So he hid under the scratchy blankets, too scared to blow the lamp out. And after a small prayer, he huffed out the lamp, darkness flooding his vision and lungs.

Fear was bitter but that's all he knew.

 


	2. odd

There were different types of quiet.

There was the calm quiet, the one Phil craved.

There was the tense quiet, Phil lives that one on his best days.

Then there are uncomfortable ones and guilty ones and this silence was a mix of all of them. It was never quiet on the ship, Captain was always yelling, Finley swore in Gaelic and Jack yelled at the crew. The sea drowned their voices in louder ones sometimes.

But now, there was a strange quiet, it was calm and Phil almost felt at peace but peace was unfamiliar and Phil of all people shouldn't feel that. So he was on edge, tense.

It was scary because the ship _shouldn't_ be this quiet, the noise was strangely comforting. Even the ocean was silenced.

Phil left his dark little room and the sky was more purple than grey.

There was singing, the soft kind, the kind his mother used to lull him to sleep at night. But this made him cry, maybe because the tune was sad, maybe because thinking about his dead mother was too heartbreaking.

Phil looked around, sailors were on the very edge of the ship, looking over the railings.

Phil tapped Finley's shoulder because he should be steering the ship. Finley didn't move and Phil tugged his shoulder.

He grabbed Finley and pulled him up. Finley fell apart under his fingers, limp with lust.

Phil hadn't finished reading the chapter on sirens but he wasn't a fool.

He shook Finley, he shook the captain but their eyes were just as purple as the sky and the women sitting on rocks were more captivating than fear.

But Phil didn't stare, his eyes didn't glaze over in lust and some of the sirens paused their songs to give him strange looks. Phil was panicking and he slapped Finley three times because "Wake up!"

But Finley simply rolled back and Phil gasped when a couple of sailors rolled over board. And he watched the sirens kiss them, blocking their breathing in a cursed move.

Then they were drifting lower until they disappeared under the sea.

Death scared Phil more than anything and he was gripping the ship's wheel so hard that his knuckles were white and tears were streaming down his face.

He steered away from the sirens, breathing shakily.

But he wasn't a sailor, just an orphan who majored in cowardice.

So he steered the ship in circles and the sirens were laughing at him and happiness didn't suit such sad creatures. And they dissolved in the sea salt the second their spell was broken.

Phil was shoved away, sailors panicked and promised to be less vulnerable. "We're men!" They would cheer and words meant nothing to Phil.

"How ya gon' get through life when e'ery little thing gets ta you?" Finley tutted, "Need ta be mor' brave, y'know? Not e'erythings gon' kill you."

"You nearly died today!" Phil shouted and Finley's eyes widened.

"Well I didnae. I'm still here." Finley said, "Ya'know why? Because I fight, you jus' give up."

And it was night and the moon looked a little purple and it should be a sign.

But Phil was thinking too hard and he didn't notice the oceans calm into nothing. He leaned against the bulwark, head far gone. Phil's eyes found a strange bob in the sea, at first he thought it was a sailor, thrown overboard.

But it was a girl.

A siren.

But she wasn't singing, just staring.

And Phil was more curious than hypnotised.

The siren drew closer, studying Phil. She sang a little, confused when Phil's eyes didn't glow purple.

"You're an odd one." The siren said, voice lighter than the wind. Phil's eyes widened when the siren's flowing hair shortened to a rough cut. Her slim face broadened with her shoulders and suddenly, she was a man.

"How queer." The siren smirked and Phil just couldn't look away.

 


	3. vile

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is a bit ugh but fuck it

"We're on the Coast of Messenia." Jack said and the Captain growled. "That's nowhere near Athens."

" _Somebody_ turned the ship around." The Captain turned to Phil and so did everyone else, "We'll just have to make do with what we got."

Phil quivered slightly, embarrassed, shaken and a little panicked from the night before.

He had been leaning over the bulwark, eyes glassy and the male siren sang to him.

And " _Daniel_ " was on the edge of his tongue and Phil had heard Jack say that the siren's name is the last thing you hear before you drown.

But Phil didn't drown because Finley was there and the siren's Adam's apple and cheekbones didn't entrance him as much as they entranced Phil.

"Begone!" Finley shouted before pulling Phil back. Phil tried to roll back but the waves crashed into "Daniel" and he was gone with the colour of violet.

"Philip, can you hear me?" Phil just heard white noise.

"He was beautiful."

And Finley grimaced in disgust, "Poor Phil, siren's got to his head. Messin' with your purity, Phil, funny how hypnotism works. Sirens are evil creatures, ya hear me? Playing' with yer hormones." 

Phil whimpered.

"Men can't be beautiful." Finley tutted.

"But he was."

"Snap out of it! Don' say thin's like tha'! It's unholy!"

Finley ushered Phil inside and Phil spent the whole night rereading the chapter on sirens. He didn't trust his book, it said centaurs were half humans and half donkey. 

It didn't say much about sirens, Phil wasn't surprised at all, just desperate.

Phil's eyes widened as the Jack muttered curses under his breath about how much Phil was "just a bundle of inconvenience set to delay us." 

"Sirens." Phil barely whispered. "Beasts," he ended and this time the Captain heard.

"What are you trying to say? Speak up!"

"There are strange creatures on the Coast of Messenia." 

"We're men, we can handle it." Jack spat, "Well, I don't know about _you_."

Phil bristled and the Captain sighed. 

And honestly, Phil was useless and Jack stopped seeing the positive in things a long time ago.

Phil was in his usual spot by the bulwark again. He watched the moon glow white and hues of purple were beginning to seep in. 

Stars stopped twinkling and the waves ceased to crash. It was Daniel again, he just wouldn't leave Phil alone.

But Phil understood why Daniel kept coming back, he had unfinished business.

Phil's eyes were shut and Daniel's laughs were echoing in his head and fuck, Phil loved it. He opened his eyes and Daniel was staring right back.

But it wasn't Daniel who tried to drown Phil, it was Jack.

Jack was yelling again when he found Phil drooling over Daniel.

"We don't need unholy sinners on our ship, I can see why your parents abandoned you." Jack growled and Daniel had stopped seducing Phil a long time ago to listen in shock.

He had thought humans were only cruel to creatures they didn't understand. Humans were civil to each other, right?

Maybe Phil was a creature they didn't understand. Maybe humans were incredibly flawed creations.

Jack pushed Phil off the ship, "We don't need you."

Phil struggled to stay above the surface and Jack laughed. He looked over at the siren who stared at the situation in shock. They made eye contact and Jack nodded his head, as if to give Daniel his permission to drown Phil.

Daniel growled right back, his eyes burned purple and weren't humans supposed to have hearts? The Gods seemed to have made a mistake when creating Jack.

Maybe Daniel saved Phil out of spite or maybe he was more humane than Jack.

He tugged Phil close, helping him stay up. He looked over at Jack, making sure he was watching.

He smirked at him and Jack grimaced at the sinister spark Daniel had in his eyes.

And Daniel pressed a bitter kiss on Phil's blue lips and tugged him away from the ship, making sure he was still breathing. He laughed at Jack's surprised face and he winked.

"Humans are such vile creatures, aren't they?" Daniel chuckled, cradling Phil's head up. Phil let out a small whimper. "Don't you worry, we've shed them."

Phil found it hard to listen and he was captivated by the glistening siren above him. His eyes didn't have to glaze purple for him to be hypnotised.


	4. amuse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im inactive also where is this story going WE'LL SEE

Black was a familiar colour and he's been seeing that for as long as he can remember.

His eyes were almost sealed shut and all he could taste was salt.

And suddenly he was coughing out his lungs and white was blinding him. 

There was a teasing chuckle and the waves were crashing too hard. Phil sat up, clutching at the light sand that covered him. It was uncomfortable, he was drenched and the cold was biting his cheeks blue.

And it took him too long to adjust to surroundings but when he did, he almost jumped out of his skin.

The siren, _Daniel_ , was staring at him and it was a little too intense for Phil's liking. Phil choked on panic and shuffled back, clumsily until his back hit the sharp boulder sticking out.

He looked around, he was on the rocking Coast of Messenia and there was a siren  _right in front of him_.

And the siren was coming closer, his movements were slow and he was just so goddamn pretty. It wasn't sunny but light seemed to reflect off the siren's smooth limps and cheeks. He looked gold but the gold was ruined with blue in the best way possible.

Daniel crawled up to Phil and Phil was a quivering mess, Maybe if he was braver, he would be long gone. Maybe if he was braver, he would've said no to the Captain and he wouldn't even be here.

But courage was a hard concept to grasp and Daniel was hovering above him.

Phil liked to think the reason he was frozen was because Daniel's eyes were physically holding him in place. It wasn't true, Phil's eyes were scrunched shut and he was bracing himself for the worst and Daniel was laughing at him.

"Pathetic little thing, aren't you?" Daniel said, voice soft but sharp. And Phil nearly missed what he said because he was so entranced by his voice. His breathing stuttered when everything caught on. "Good thing you're pretty."

Daniel's fingertips were blue and he looked cold. Phil knew for sure that sirens didn't feel things and cold was just another word. But he couldn't think in situations like this and what he did next might've been the bravest thing he's done in his 18 years of life.

He pushed Daniel away, he tried to punch him but either he missed or pain didn't exist for Daniel.

But Daniel was caught off-guard and Phil tried to run away.

Daniel found it absolutely hilarious, which is why he didn't stop the idiot stranger. He watched Phil stumble about because his legs had been asleep for a long time. He watched Phil wince as he stepped on a sea shell and he watched the panic on Phil's face.

Phil didn't remember what happened but he was away from siren related danger. The beach extended into trees and a forest. Phil leaned against a tree, except he was where strange things lurked.

He might've escaped the siren but he hadn't escaped Greece.

And the tree was moving. Phil moved away to see the dips and curves of the tree turned into a girl, a dryad. Phil hadn't gotten to the chapter on dryads in his little book but he assumed they were dangerous. He assumed everything was dangerous.

So he tripped on roots and shuffled to meet yet another dryad who stared at him curiously. Phil ran away and he hated how the flowers moved without wind.

And there were Meliae everywhere, their ash trees twisted with confusion and amusement. Soon the whole forest was alive with amusement and the trees were whispering to each other.

Leaves seemed to swirl around him, laughing and eventually he reached a clearing. There was a serene lake and he was relieved. 

Naiads and mermaids were lounging about and they raised their eyebrows.

And all Phil really heard was a familiar chuckle and black was a close friend at this point.

 


	5. spite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kind of a filler I'm trying to figure out how the whole character development thing is gonna work

"Did you hit him up the head when you ' _rescued_ ' him?"

"No, he's just stupid."

"Looks about ready to die."

"Well, let him die then."

"Daniel, what was the point of you rescuing him if you're just going to leave him?"

"It's _Dan_ , get that through the thick trunk of yours." Dan spat and the dryad shrunk back into her tree. Dan tapped Phil's head and all Phil felt was cold.

Escaping Dan was pointless, really because every time Phil would run away, he'd somehow end up in the same spot as before.

He wasn't exactly sure why he was trying so hard to run, he was going to die anyways. But there were perks of living in fear, sometimes fear motivated him to do things.

Phil was back in the beach, clothes half dry and skin covered in sand. He didn't run away this time and Dan tilted his head in amusement. Phil gulped and slowly shuffled back until his back hit the boulder sticking out.

Dan found it absolutely thrilling how fearful Phil was of him.

But really, it was pointless keeping Phil because the only thing he was good for was entertainment. But it was the same joke: him running away and getting caught in roots and finding nymphs scary.

So Dan let him go after he just couldn't laugh, Dan was the type to get bored easily. He wouldn't try to stop Phil the next time he left.

Except Phil never really left, he just shrunk into a ball and stayed like that for as long as he could.

"He's not my responsibility." Dan rolled his eyes when Daphne, the bored mermaid who liked to laze on boulders, told him he should feed Phil.

"You rescued him!" Her eyes bulged out.

"Yeah, so?" Dan asked, "I ' _rescue_ ' a lot of sailors." 

Daphne was quiet for a while.

"Are those all the sailors you seduce? You bring them to shore before you drown them?" Daphne asked.

"Don't tell Achelous, I'm not meant to be doing that." Dan whispered, playing with clumps of sand.

"What do you do with them?" Daphne dared.

"Fuck, coitus, sex, whatever you want to call it." Dan sighed, almost bored.

"Are you going to do that with hi-"

"You ask a lot of questions."

"I'm sorry? You're a complex being."

Dan rolled his eyes, "No, I'm not going to do anything with him."

Daphne looked over at Phil, picking at his fingers to avoid hypothermia.

"Humans are so...cruel. They threw him out and waited for me to kill him." Dan suddenly said. "I didn't, out of spite. Saved him, out of spite."

"Rebel against Achelous out of spite?" Daphne questioned and Dan smirked.

"You were always a smart one." 

Daphne grinned, "Give him some fish, I pity him."

"Then you give him the fish."

"I can't walk on land, you idiot."

"That's not my problem."

Daphne called Phil over when Dan was away. Phil gulped and he hobbled to the mermaid, slightly scared that she might turn him to stone with just a stare. Or wait, that was a gorgon- well whatever, everything was dangerous.

But the mermaid handed him a salmon.

"Might as well die with a full stomach."

Phil didn't get to eat the fish because he didn't really know how to cook it over the fire he barely made.

He fell asleep next to the little fire, his stomach rumbling and he was praying. His voice was faint but Dan could hear his pleads for mercy.

And he said he did it for Daphne. He shook Phil awake and handed him the salmon he had held over the fire.

Dan laughed a little when he backed away, as if it was instinct. He finished the salmon before Dan could blink.

"You're a little useless, you know that?" Dan said with a laugh and Phil looked down, almost nodding. Dan's eyes didn't soften. "What's your name?"

"Ph-Phil." His answer took years and his voice was weak and broken from the lack of use.

Dan trailed his fingers down his chest.

Daphne rolled her eyes when Dan came back, as if she was waiting for Dan to kill off Phil and that was the plan.

But the fire was crackling and the embers looked pretty against Phil's sad, blue eyes. The dryads were watching too, expecting what was to be expected. The nymphs left to the other side because they didn't like death.

And Dan twirled Phil's black hair in between his fingers when Phil stopped flinching away.

He decided he'd let Phil live tonight, only out of spite.


	6. unease

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> idk how to progress I'm trying to find my footing in all this

"You're too quiet." 

Phil looked away. His clothes were dry at this point and Dan seemed to be delaying his death. Phil was more than grateful.

"Sorry." 

Conversations with Phil were short and failing almost. Dan hated them. 

He liked leaving Phil to Daphne who stopped taking pity on Phil a while back.

"His silence annoys me." Daphne had tutted.

"You live in silence."

"Yeah but it's...it's very uncomfortable." 

Dan shrugged and there wasn't much he could do about that. 

Phil was an uneasy being who's stares were painful and he was crafted from clay and regret. Everyone wanted him dead and Dan was a spiteful being.

He had made that quite clear when Achelous told him that it's shameful to spare sailors. He had spared quite a few right after hearing that rule. He was meant to stay in his maiden form at all times but he called himself a man on purpose.

Dan was a very backward siren, only doing the opposite of what was told. Dryads wondered if his 'rebel against everything' was just a mere phase or a permanent part of his personality.

It was quite obviously the latter.

Phil had left the coast a dozen times and he'd come back on his own free will. Maybe it Dan was just another familiar thing. Maybe he was stupid.

But he didn't want Dan to become another familiar thing, he wanted to go back home to England where his bed had more dust than comfort and his bath had more grime than soap.

Phil left again, with an actual intention of finding help. He waded through the forest, trying not to flinch at every movement.

Dan went with him.

"Messenia isn't a place for a coward." Dan told him.

"I'm- I'm trying to leave."

"You never will."

Phil stopped walking, "Why?"

"Look at yourself, a slave to his own fears. A slave to me."

"I don't want to be."

"Well, you'll just have to fight, won't you?"

"I can't."

"I guess you're stuck here."

Phil was soaked in tears and an uneasy feeling of fear churned in his stomach. 

 


	7. slave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not smut but like................you get me?

And Phil was pathetic to the point where Dan stopped being spiteful to take pity.

Those were the stages, really. Amusement, spite, pity, even more pity and just torture.

"I want to see how long...you'll last." And maybe Dan did resort to sex with Phil because he was writhing under the sand underneath Dan who's blue fingers lapped against his nipples.

Dan didn't feel anything and Phil was feeling too much.

"Do you feel that?" Dan whispered in his ear, breathing ragged. He nipped Phil's ear, licking the shell.

"Y-yeah."

"What do you feel?" Dan asked.

"You-your hands. Everywhere." Dan licked down Phil's abdomen and he was playing with him at this point. Dan's blue hands teased along the base of Phil's cock and Phil's eyes were as purple as his cheeks.

"And?"

"Good, feels good." And his words were purple too.

Phil was reaching his climax and Dan pumped harder.

"Do you feel like exploding?" Dan asked.

"Yea-yes!"

And Dan was gone.

And horrible was a feeling within feelings.

It saddened Phil that this was what he was reduced to. He wondered if it as worse than 'orphan boy.' He was a siren's sex toy, held captive by his own fears.

He was old news now, the forest didn't care. Daphne gave him fish everyday and Azurea, the nice dryad Meliae showed him how to make fire properly.

"You don't have to be so scared." Azurea said as Phil watched. "Why are you so scared?"

"Coping mechanism."

Azurea smiled, "You're the strangest human I've ever met."

Phil shrugged.

"i've heard of brave humans who save damsels from towers and resurrect princesses from heavy slumber." Azurea said.

"I've heard of Gorgons who kill with one look and Goddesses who curse innocent beings."

"Don't mock our deities." Azurea snapped.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend."

The fire was made and Phil hadn't seen Dan in a long time.

"Why hasn't he drowned me yet?" Phil asked.

"Daniel is...he's a complex being."

"Not that complex if you ask me." Daphne interjected, "You say yes, he says no. You tell him to jump off a bridge, he'll jump off a cliff. You tell him to kill men, he kills women."

She looked Phil in the eyes, "Sailors want you dead, he doesn't." 

Phil gulped.

"Well, I mean, that was his intention." Azurea said, "Now I don't know. He doesn't care anymore, you've bored him."

"I talent of mine, I guess." Phil shrugged and Azurea stared at him. She blew out the fire she had made for him.

"You do it. It can be another talent of yours."

Phil couldn't do it but Azurea's smiles were warm and he was so used to cold.

The cold was back somewhere in the night and Dan had snaked himself around Phil.

"Look at me."

Phil groaned and Dan grabbed his jaw and forced Phil to look into his eyes.

His eyes turned violet again and Dan ordered him to 'suck me off.'

And Phil really couldn't say no.

Dan told him he was a slave to his fears, to Dan.

And when Phil looked up into Dan's eyes, mouth full of Dan, he'd agree.

He was a mere slave to Dan.

 


	8. cold

Phil was under the illusion everything was going to hurt him. 

His mum used to reassure him at night when thunder roared and lightning struck. She'd tell him that the sky was just excited.

"You know when you're watching your friends play games with a ball and when they win, everyone cheers?" She asked, "Well, that's what the sky's doing. They're cheering."

"The sky?"

"Or the angels above the sky. They're playing and the angels are winning."

But his mum wasn't there and angels didn't have a ball.

And it was pouring. Phil was sat on the boulder, just watching rain melt with the sea.

"You're gonna catch a cold." Dan said and Phil gasped. Dan chuckled, eyes hollow. "Here, I-" And Phil flinched away when Dan's fingers brushed against his shoulders.

"I've touched you before, Phil." Dan scoffed.

"That's different."

"How?"

"I wasn't sober." Phil swallowed. Dan sighed and sat on the boulder next to Phil and for once he didn't try anything. 

"Do you want to go home?"

"Yes." Phil said after a while.

"What's home like?" Dan asked and rain was pouring on them.

"Dirty beds. Grey skies. Shouting."

"That sounds depressing." Dan chuckled. Phil shrugged.

"Closest to home." Phil sighed and he wasn't as scared. Maybe he was just fucking tired of everything, maybe he just didn't care. Maybe Dan was harmless when he listened.

"My home's cold." Dan said.

"I thought sirens didn't feel cold."

"Where'd you hear that?"

"In a book I was reading." Phil answered.

"The book's utter crap then. Sirens, we feel too much. But we get used to it because what else is there to do?"

It was quiet again.

"I don't like the cold." Dan said after a while.

"I don't like the cold either."

"You're cold now."

"I'm as used to it as you."

"You have a choice, Phil." And it was the first time Dan had said his name that wasn't in a teasing manner. "Come on then, Karyas will help you warm up."

And Dan's fingers around Phil's wrist was cold but then again, so was everything.

 


	9. dark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapters are gonna be slower to update bc I'm slowly losing motivation (writers block can just fuck off)
> 
> I miss writing fluffy high school fics so I'm gonna be posting some on my [tumblr](http://ecstasin.tumblr.com/phanfic)
> 
> maybe

Some Anthousai nymphs made him clothes out of silk.

And slowly by slowly, he was adapting to the forest. He tried making a little shelter and it faltered every time a dryad laughed. They helped him at the end and he thanked them profusely.

He wouldn't leave his little shelter because he was still a little scared of everything.

"Want to know a secret?" Dan asked and he was sitting in the little shelter with Phil.

"Alright."

"The world is really not that scary."

"It is to me." Phil shrugged and Dan was picking at the little daisies peaking out. 

"I can prove you wrong."

"I'd like to see you try." 

"Ok. Come on."

"What? _Now?_ " Phil spat, eyes widening.

"Yes, get up." And Dan was standing outside the shelter now.

"It's dark, I could die!" 

"Stop being so silly, let's go, the dark can be pretty."

"No, no, no." But he stepped out anyways and the dark was prettier than the day.

Fireflies shone brighter and at first Phil cowered away. Dan grabbed his wrist and offered him a _smile_.

"Sirens don't smile?" Phil at one point.

Dan threw his head back in laughter, "Where'd you get that from? Your little book?"

Phil nodded, shying away and Dan smiled again.

"Well, I'm quite different from most sirens, aren't I?"

Dan's fingers were indigo in the dark and they were cold.

Phil didn't mind.

They walked through the grass and the flowers seemed to glow. Dan picked up a glowing dandelion and handed it to Phil. Phil stared at it and Dan blew away the petals with a giggle. Phil was mesmerised by the fluorescent fluff floating around them.

He blew away more and maybe he smiled too.

Dan led him around the trees and he told Phil that Kissiae nymphs were ash tree nymphs.

"They're not dangerous."

"What about, um, what're they called? Mel- M-"

"Meliae? They're not dangerous either. Nymphs aren't dangerous. We're not dangerous."

"You are."

"Well, not to you, I guess."

And slowly by slowly, Phil stopped flinching away from the siren.

"Are you still scared of the dark?" Dan asked when the sun started replacing the moon.

"Not as much."


	10. replay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SO SORRY FOR THE LOONG WAIT UGH just kind of flying in and out of the phantom idk what to do.
> 
> I'm not as connected to phan but i don't want to leave this fic unfinished so here's a crappy chapter.

Phil's voice was deep when it wasn't shielded with fear.

Dan visited a lot now, the nymphs didn't consider it visiting anymore.

Dan would pull Phil to the the rocky shores at night.

"This is- it's quite dangerous." Phil said, flinching away from the crashing waves.

"You'll get used to it." Dan brushed damp hair away from his eyes and Phil's eyes stayed locked on his blue fingertips that reflected moonlight.

Dan was so pretty.

And sometimes they wouldn't even talk, just listen to the waves crashing.

"Do you miss home?" Dan asked. Dan didn't feel bad for taking him from civilisation. Maybe he was heartless.

Maybe he just didn't want Phil getting more death threats from his own species.

"...no."

Dan asked where he was from, 'how come your voice is different from mine?' and Phil would furrow his eyebrows in confusion because 'did you mean accent?'

"I was born in England. It's different from here."

"How different?"

"I've told you." And Phil's voice had a playful lilt to it. Dan shuffled closer, hoping to catch that tone again.

"Tell me again."

And Dan never really listened which is why he kept asking Phil to repeat himself every week.

"Short attention span?" Phil asked but he didn't mind telling Dan a million times.

"Something like that."

But really, Dan was just mouthing everything Phil said because his voice was deep like Dan's home and just as pretty.

 


	11. lost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh i've left the phandom but i don't want to leave this fic hanging so I'm gonna try my best to finish it ugh.
> 
> Also i might write random phan one shots even though i'm not part of the phandom bc they're fun to write about?????thisisn'timportantcarryon
> 
> (i might write haikyuu!! fanfic, anyone in that fandom?)

"You don't drown sailors anymore." Achelous stated and Dan froze. The river God stared down at him and Dan puffed out his chest. He's not scared. He's not scared. He's not scared.

"You don't visit your daughters anymore but they're not complaining." Dan shrugged, gesturing to all the sirens the deity has been neglecting.

"Daniel-"

"Don't call me-"

"Did you forget who you're talking to?"

And Dan stayed quiet.

Orarin told him he had spent more time on land than in the sea. He just rolled his eyes and mussed up his hair. Orarin just sighed and prayed for her brother's wellbeing.

"Oh. I thought you weren't going to show up." Phil said when Dan finally swam up the shores.

"You were waiting for me?" Dan grinned.

"Um. Yeah, you said we might go and explore the rest of the forest." Phil played with his fingers.

Dan bit his bottom lip and skimmed his fingers down Phil's arm.

"Follow me."

And they were off.

And really, Dan isn't all that experienced around the forest but he told Phil to "trust me! I know everything about this place!" 

He was glad Phil's little myth book was incorrect because Phil didn't know that Dan was just as clueless as him. Dan's a siren, he doesn't know the land as well as he knows the seas.

But the dryads helped guide them around after giggling about how stupid Dan looked.

Phil didn't talk as much as Dan hoped but his little awed noises were just as satisfying. So Dan grinned and ventured deeper.

"Are we lost?" Phil asked and yes they were very lost. He didn't need to know that.

"Lost? Ha, don't you trust me?"

"You're not giving me any choice now are you?"

"But still."

"I trust you. For now."

"That's all the trust I need in the world." And maybe Phil rolled his eyes. Dan blinked too soon.

Anthousais guided them back to the shore with pink daisies and it was night once more.

"You can't stay?" Phil asked as Dan backed away into the lapping sea.

"You want me to stay?" Dan asked.

"Um, yeah. That'd be nice."

And Phil was a little worried Dan was hypnotising him into liking the deceiving siren. But his eyes weren't purple. They were amber and mischievous and Phil really liked his eyes.

Phil used to rummage around the crevices in his old orphanage because his caretaker told him he might find books if he was lucky. He found rotten candy the first three times but finally, he found one.

It was old and the pages were half gone and it was densely boring.

It was about Stockholm Syndrome and Phil was sure it wasn't valuable information. But now, as he stood on the edge of Greece with the prettiest siren he's ever seen, he began to wonder if the syndrome was affecting him.

 


	12. gone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAH I KEEP FORGETTING TI UPDATE SOZZO

Time just didn't exist anymore.

If his old caretaker was here, Phil thought, he'd have been punished for sleeping through the days and exploring through the night.

Good thing he wasn't in England.

"How does it feel?" Phil asked Dan once, "To kill?"

Dan looked at him and he was glowing blue. Phil stared at him longer and the blue glow around his cheeks suddenly speckled with pink. 

A siren's blush.

"It feels, well, I don't know." Dan said, "I feel nothing though."

"Do other sirens feel that? Nothing?"

"No, they feed off it. The fear in a sailor's eyes, it's like blood to our veins. Me, personally, I'm just bored." Dan leaned back into the waves.

Phil scurried back when a wave crashed by his feet and Dan laughed.

"What? You scared of the sea? How're you a sailor?"

"Oh I- I'm not. A sailor, I'm just."

"Just?"

"Just an orphan dragged into an adventure." Phil concluded with a bitter smile. Dan tilted his head and shuffled forward, towards the sand. He dug a little hole in the wet sand, feeling the roughness of it slip between his fingertips.

"What's an orphan?"

"An orphan is-" Dan took Phil's hand and placed it in the hole he crafted, "A minor who has no parents."

"Huh, humans need that don't they? A family." Dan sighed, burying Phil's hand deeper. "Where'd yours go?"

"Uh, well, my parents died."

Dan didn't press on.

"Well, you have this forest now." Dan said, trying to be reassuring, a strange emotion for a strange siren. 

"Is that a good thing?"

"Of course and uh, guess I'm here too." Dan shrugged.

"Is- are you blushing?"

"What? No, sirens don't- I don't blush."

And Phil was smiling and Dan wasn't sure what was so off about him. His confused expression smoothed to a gasp- Phil doesn't smile, he frowns in a scared way but smile? No.

It made him look more relaxed, less tense and Dan soaked it in because he could tell smiles from Phil were rare, incredibly rare because it was gone in the next second.

"What's that face you're making?" Phil asked.

"I- I dunno, you look nice."

"Huh?"

"Smiling, you look nice smiling. That's all." Dan looked up, the sun was completely gone and the stars refrained from twinkling.

"You know you're not as tense anymore." Dan said.

"Well, I guess I have no reason to be."

Dan nudged into him.

And he was meant to be back in the seas when the sun hit the ocean but maybe Phil would smile again, that was worth the wait.

Maybe.

 


	13. trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i forgot the rhythm for this fic ahaha(pain) bUT ILL TRY TO FINISH IT SOON

It was cold and this time Dan could _feel_ it.

He willed himself to feel it, he willed himself to feel pain because right at this moment he absolutely _hated_ himself.

What was he doing? What the hell was he doing with a fucking human?

What is he doing with _Phil?_

And his hair was mussed up from vicious tugging because the siren had lost his _edge_.

His sisters even commented on it.

"Are you ill, Daniel?" They had asked, "Why are you smiling?"

"Why are you so happy?"

No, he wasn't happy- that was almost a forbidden emotion.

Sirens weren't happy creatures, they were predators, feasting on hate and fear.

Feasting on death.

He should've killed Phil when he had the chance and Daphne had agreed.

"Well, I mean, that _is_ your purpose. To kill." Daphne shrugged, "It's not that late-"

"Autumn passed a week ago. That's a long time."

"You can finish it off now." Daphne said, in an attempt to calm him. He nodded, scraping his hair back with harsh force. Daphne winced.

"Yeah, yeah I'll do it now." He said. He shivered again. "It's disgusting, ugh, I don't understand how you can be happy."

Daphne quirked her eyebrow up.

"It's like, I dunno, I don't want to feel it. Ever." He said, gagging almost. "I'm gonna do it now, Phil isn't my problem anymore, yeah, ok."

"There's my incredibly heartless best friend." Daphne cheered. Dan nodded and waited till it was night.

He was chanting to himself, 'Just hold his head down, he's weak anyways, it won't matter,' but Phil was there by the rocks, feet dangling in the water.

"Dan!" He greeted and he looked so...fragile.

Dan shook that thought away.

"Do you know how to swim?" Dan asked.

"Well, no. Ironic as I was on a ship for a month." Phil said and Dan's eyes widened, that was the answer he wasn't expecting but it did make things easier. Way too easy and he hated Phil for being so weak and _easy._

"Do-" And it was hard to force the words out, "Do you want me to teach you?"

Phil tilted his head, "Sure!"

And Dan just couldn't help but think that a few months ago, Phil would've hesitated, maybe even say no because he was scared of the sea.

But now, he _trusted_ Dan.

Dan felt horrible.

He gently helped Phil out to the sea and he knew Daphne was watching. Phil clung onto him and Dan cursed himself for smiling. He refused to say it was a fond smile.

"It-it's cold."

"You'll get used to it." Dan said. And they stayed like that for a while.

"Why do you look so s-sad?" Phil asked, teeth chattering.

"Huh? Oh, well, sirens are sad creatures so."

"Oh. Ok then, you don't usually seem sad." Phil said, "Ok, teach me."

And this was the part where Dan let go. This was the part where he pushed Phil's head down, letting the water suffocate him, clog up his lu-

But the moonlight was shining right into his eyes and he looked so small, barely keeping up.

"Aren't you scared?" Dan asked.

"Very. But also really cold so c-can you come closer?"

And Dan did.

Daphne was waiting, the sadder part of his instincts were waiting.

_Push him down._

Dan let out a shaky sigh.

"You should learn how to float first then." 

 


	14. power

And maybe Dan was smitten.

Phil liked to say he was weak with a bitter smile and ' _ha, yeah, I was the odd one out_.' But Dan felt weaker the more he stayed around Phil.

Maybe he was getting weaker or Phil was getting stronger- he knew how to hunt now.

He made Dan tag along because he had that power now, he could make Dan do things.

Dan decided if he couldn't kill the mortal, he should leave for a while.

He went back to luring out sailors.

He missed it.

Dan would wait by the rocky edges of the caves at night for ships to pass by. He wouldn't attack, just wait for someone to notice him.

It was hard not to notice, his skin gave off a cold blue glow, his eyes were dark and set on seduction, fingers mixing with the waves.

He'd be feminine at first, it was fun this way, his long brown hair would mix with the water and he'd edge forward.

His sailor would be transfixed on luminescent skin and sharp collarbones and then he'd change. His purple eyes would stay the same as his shoulders broadened, hair shortened, jawline sharpened.

He would watch confusion flash after awe, then fear because _'this is a man, I cannot-'_ but hypnotism is so much stronger. They wouldn't notice their feet edging towards the edge of the ship, they wouldn't notice just how helpless they are.

And they would hit the water with a splash and Dan would smother the sound with a kiss- he'd bite their lips, bruising them and he'd swirl his tongue around the blood. 

He was about to take away a life.

He lived for it.

Then his eyes would stop glowing purple and the sailor would realise that yes, he was going to die.

And Dan would kiss them again, biting their lips again with their screams and he's sink down. Sailors would thrash in his arms but his kiss held them in place. He'd draw blood again, bottom lip split open. He'd watch the crimson mix with the blue of the sea. He'd watch their eyes glaze over, soul leaving through their lips, into Dan.

Then he'd kiss them again, lips cold and dead. His fingers would clench around hair and he'd twist and pull until he heard the crack of their neck breaking.

Then he'd leave, the taste of blood still on his lips.

He'd still go back to the coast, Phil would still be waiting and "you didn't show yesterday? what happened?"

And he makes Dan feel guilty. _Vulnerable_.

Weak.

"Well, come on, I have to show you something." And it was sweet exploring until dawn and Dan shouldn't stay out for this long, he belonged in the sea, his skin was beginning to cake over, his glow was dulling but the more he said "No, Phil, I need to go back-"

And Phil would smile, "Just a little longer?"

And Dan just couldn't escape.


	15. drown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i gotta edit those tags they're misleading where is this fic heading

He was dead.

The sailor was dead and Phil was crouched over him. Neck broken, lips bleeding, bruising.

"Huh." He simply said and Phil looked over at Dan. There was blood by the corners of his mouth. Phil wiped it away with his thumb.

"Are you scared?" Dan asked.

"No."

"Why the fuck not? He's dead! I killed him!" Dan said and what happened to the weak, quiet Phil who wouldn't speak unless spoken to?

"Well yeah. You're a siren." Phil crossed his legs, "I'm not scared you're gonna do this to me, if that's what you're wondering. I would've been dead by now."

"I killed a man-"

"I trust you."

Dan's eyes widened before realising that Phil's not leaving.

_He's never going to leave._

He made Dan dig a grave and Phil said some things.

"There's a dead man around now."

Phil hummed.

"Do you understand what I'm capable of?"

"Dan, it almost sounds like you want to scare me." Phil grinned, "I'm past those days, honest. You're the last person that scares me."

In this month, Dan had tried to kill Phil three times.

First time, he accidentally taught Phil how to swim instead.

Second, Phil stared so deep into his eyes with cheeks blushed red and Dan forgot.

And now Phil was trailing his fingers down his neck.

"I can see why you like being in the sea." Phil said and Dan couldn't concentrate and Phil was a fucking burden now.

He hated Phil.

He was innocent, this one, he was inferior- nothin-

"What are you thinking about?" Phil asked.

"Nothing."

"Yes you are. That's your thinking face."

"You keep a record of my faces?" Dan asked, heart speeding up.

Phil was dangerous.

And close, his hands were pressed against his chest, nose almost brushing his.

"I- heh-yeah. And your smiles too."

And Dan couldn't remember what happened, Phil some things that were sweet- and Dan should be gagging because he hated things sweet but they way Phil said it- and they were kissing now.

Dan hates how he changed, he didn't even look apologetic now- it made his heart race.

He even ran his tongue over his lips and drowning, Dan was drowning in Phil.

 


	16. waiting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guys guys guys i post a bunch of chapters at once when i update so if you're ever like "wtf this doesn't make any sense whats going on," or "this story is all disconnecting" then you've probably missed a few chapters
> 
> (I'm looking at you ben)
> 
> \----ALSO MENTION OF CANNIBALISM----

It was one thing being distracted on land.

But being distracted in the sea was a new thing on its own.

"Oi, focus goddamit!" One of his sisters' yelled. He looked up, motion delayed by the weight of the sea.

"What?"

"What do you mean what? You haven't caught a sailor yet, what's wrong with you?" Another hissed.

"Lazy, lazy, laaaaazy..." Another giggled, circling him.

"We don't have time to get distracted, you're weighing everyone down."

"Wait till father hears of this."

Dan snarled back, baring his teeth, "The fuck is he gonna do? If he wanted to banish me, then he would've a century ago."

"If Achelous doesn't then we will. Cannibalism isn't frowned upon here, y'know."

Dan swam back, away from his sisters.

Fear thrummed in his heart and no sailor veered his way. One ship did but he was just too distracted by the thought of Phil and his sisters ripping out his heart and Phil-

The ship was gone.

He missed his chance.

It was the first ship he had missed- no sailor had even noticed him.

He looked at himself, his fingers- the glow was dimming.

He cursed atop the rocks, his glow was going away what would happen if his sisters see? He wasn't meant to be on land anyways, wasn't meant to be in the forest, curled up in the flowers with Phil trailing fingers down his jaw-

Phil.

He wasn't meant to be with Phil.

Roaming in the lands was frowned upon, painful but sparing a mortal was demeaning, _forbidden._

Now was he hit with that realisation- what if they found Phil? He'd be turned to sea foam and Phil would be ripped apart and maybe even eaten.

So he skipped the next few ships and he swam right back to Phil and there he was.

Waiting, smiling.

"Dan! I thought you wouldn't come!" Phil giggled.

Dan's eyes softened, Phil was going to be ok for no-

No, he was going to be ok- where did his selfish way of thinking go?

When did Dan change?


	17. scream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> reminder that if this fic sounds confusing then you've missed a couple of chapters bc i update twice when I'm actually bothered to update
> 
> also by the way, Achelous (who I've mentioned a couple of times) is the father of sirens okok
> 
> \---ALSO TRIGGER WARNING GORE AND BLOOD AND JAWRIPPAGE---

Nightmares for a siren was a dream.

Because nothing scared fear, nothing taunted those shrouded in evil.

But Dan's sisters glare viciously at him because his skin was almost papery and he stopped killing.

Dan had nightmares.

And they were all about Phil, Phil, Phil because right now, he was the sun in his life and Achelous had told him so many times that the sun was bad for sirens.

But still, Dan chased the sun and he was so close to burning up.

His sisters scare him lately, they shouldn't because he was just like them- no he wasn't, he was weaker and lazier and he had taken rebellion a little too far. But it wasn't uncommon for sirens to turn against each other, Dan had seen his sisters kill other sisters and he was the next victim.

But that didn't scare him as much as them finding Phil because no, not Phil- they'll do more than just sink their nails into his wrists, they'll do more than just torture him.

And Phil didn't deserve that.

So he kept guard, for ten days he didn't leave the shore and Phil was pale from worry.

"Dan you're- Dan! Can you hear me? You're all pale and tired, are you- what's wrong? Are you hurt?" Phil asked, cupping his hands around Dan's cheeks that were far more fragile than Phil's right now.

"Didn't you know? The sun is bad for me." Dan laughed a little.

"Then go back! Go back to the sea, I don't want you to die."

"I can't die, Phil. I can just grow weaker." Dan sighed.

"Well I don't want you to grow weaker, please go back. Please." Phil begged and Dan's tired eyes widened because Phil was crying. He hadn't seen Phil cry in such a long time.

"Then you'll be in danger."

"I'll be fine." Phil laughed a little. He pecked at Dan's salty cheekbone, sliding his lips down to rest near his ear. "You're just a little paranoid." He whispered.

"Paranoid? I don't get paranoid."

"Oh? Is this Dan not wanting to leave me? You'll miss me too much, is that it?" Phil giggled and Dan smiled. "I'll visit you, how about that."

"You can't breathe under water, stupid." Dan nudged his head against Phil's shoulder.

"Then come back when you've recovered. I'll wait. For you."

Dan nodded, he could live with that.

So he left for a week, two weeks and the nightmares continued.

Until they weren't nightmares anymore because one of his sisters found Phil and he was rushing through the ocean like a riptide.

"Oh, what's this?" Kleonia sneered when Dan was crawling onto the shore, coughing because fear was taking over his whole body. Wet sand grabbed at him almost and the water waded at his feet, trying to pull him back.

Because he wasn't meant to be here.

"Is this where you've been scurrying off to? This is why you've been slacking off?" Kleonia continued, "What's so special about this place? It's so hot and-"

"Dan?"

And it was Phil and Dan's heart was deciding between beating tremendously fast or stopping completely.

Phil's eyes edged towards Kleonia and he froze in place. Her dark lips curled into a sneer, her eyebrows caved in, silver eyes narrowed.

"A human?" She looked at Dan who was pulling himself up because fear was weighing him down and he hated it. He hated feeling. "This is who you've been- You saved him- spared him?! You fucking idiot! It's like you're asking to be banished!" She growled because she could not believe it.

"Him of all people? You spared _him?_ " She spat, looking at Phil who was trying his best to stand upright, trying to not look scared.

"Shut up." Dan said, voice shaking. She whipped around, grey hair wrapping around her.

"Is little Daniel weak for this- this mortal?" And she was laughing, roaring and now Phil was in her clutches.

"Get off-!" His cries were cut off by a gasp as nails dug into his wrists, threatening to pierce a vein.

"Wait til Achelous hears about this, you're gonna be turned to sea foam-"

"Don't you fucking hurt him!" And Dan was lunging and clawing and he was sure he caught a glimpse of fear in Kleonia's eyes. He shoved her down, yelling at Phil to run, don't turn around, close your ears.

But Phil stopped running halfway and he forgot to close his ears. 

And all he could hear was crying and a choke and something being ripped apart.

He turned around, he shouldn't have.

Because Dan was covered in blood and tears, one hand fisted into her hair, the other holding her jaw.

And now Phil was crouching over, coughing and throwing up because Dan was holding nothing else but her jaw.

"You- you ripped out her-"

"I told you to run." Dan stated firmly, pushing at her heart that was still beating. Phil turned around, he didn't want to see, he didn't want to hear, he didn't want to-

But he could still see all the blood, the bones, the jaw behind his eyelids and his ears were covered but he still could hear the sirens scream.

She was howling and crying and suddenly it all stopped. 

Phil didn't dare turn around.

 


	18. fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IKEEPFORGETTING TO UPDATE ILL TRY TO FINISH ASAP

Maybe Phil lost his voice.

Maybe he refused to talk.

But Dan craved his daily dose of deep laughs, of high pitched exclamations, of harsh observations.

He missed Phil.

Which was stupid because Phil.

Was.

Right.

There.

Sitting there, pale faced, trembling, mortified.

The last thing Phil said to Dan was a series of scared words.

"What happens to sirens when they- they diminish?"

Dan looked at the sea, watched the waves as if the answers were there.

"We turn to sea foam."

Phil was scared again. Of Dan this time.

And it hurt Dan way too much, to have his lover fear him.

To have Phil look away every time he stepped towards the pale land.

Phil stopped greeting him the second he waded on shore.

Dan felt too much pain.

Phil twitched a lot.

He clawed at his hair when it was quiet for too long.

The dryads told Dan that Phil would scream just so he wouldn't feel too alone.

Dan shoved his face into the waves, so that his tears would melt with the salt water.

So he stayed on shore with Phil hours after dark, hours into the day.

Phil wouldn't talk, just scream.

So Dan screamed with him and it hurt his lungs, it hurt his everything.

But he still screamed just so Phil didn't crumble and fall alone.

 


	19. interrupt

They didn't talk.

But Dan was there.

Sitting on the boulder next to the trembling figure.

Screaming next to him.

Laying on the sand next to him.

And it took Dan too long to figure that Phil didn't fear him.

He couldn't fear him.

He just feared his actions.

The the sound of bones crunching in his fist.

The screams muffled in sand.

The tears that shone bright red.

"I wouldn't do that to y-"

"I know that!" Phil interrupted, screaming because of course, of course of course Dan wouldn't hurt him.

He knows.

Dan didn't say anything, nothing needed to be said.

But Phil's fingers were wound tight in his hair pulling because he just couldn't get the gorey images out of his head.

So Dan laced those rough fingers between his, and he kept his hand in his lap.

 


	20. stay

"Don't you need to go back?"

"Where?" Dan asked and there were stars in the sky but Phil was just staring numbly at Dan's jawline.

"To the sea."

"I don't want to."

"But you're growing weaker."

Dan just nestled closer, curling into Phil, fitting into him perfectly.

Dan just hummed in reply and Phil slung an arm around him, pulling him close.

"What's gonna happen now?" Phil asked.

"What do you mean? Nothing."

"Your sister she's..."

"Doesn't matter really."

"How could it not matter?"

"You ask a lot of questions, huh?" Dan turned to look into Phil's eyes.

"It's only human nature."

Dan simply purred.

"Are you going to get into trouble?"

"No. No I'll be fine, don't worry."

"I can't not worry."

"Human nature?"

"No that's just my nature."

Dan's laugh came out as a purr.

"So what are you gonna do now then?" Phil asked again.

"Stay here with you, I guess."

And he stayed with Phil far too long.


	21. distress

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> four updates at once wow whoa there

Phil, in Dan's point of view, was probably the worst thing to ever happen.

Because Dan had the honour of watching him timidly creep out of his shell.

Phil's voice ranges from the lowest of lows to the highest of highs and it sends shivers down every part of Dan.

Phil laughs with the tip of his tongue poking out and that alone does things to Dan's heart.

And Dan would find himself just dedicating more than half his life to Phil.

Doing things for Phil.

Giving up home for Phil.

And the moment Dan figured out that he loved Phil, his heart skipped three beats.

And sometimes his heart stopped completely, when he was around Phil.

But now he wasn't with Phil, no he was alone in the sea, Achelous looming over him and fear was thrumming in his heart.

Achelous didn't say much for the first five minutes, he simply glared holes into Dan because Dan knew what he did wrong.

"Are you scared, Daniel?" Achelous asked.

Dan didn't answer and Achelous drifted forward until Dan was forced to drift back.

"What exactly are you scared of?"

Dan looked down, at the abyss.

"Me?"

Dan played with his fingers. The glow was gone completely.

"Your sisters?"

Dan squeezed his eyes shut, blood roaring in his ears.

"Phil?"

And his eyes snapped up, wide open with distress.

And that look alone gave everything away.

Achelous laughed and everything darkened.

"You thought I didn't know? You thought you were being discreet? You thought-" Achelous swam forward, cornering Dan. "-You thought you could fool me? Your father?"

And he tutted, mock offended.

"Underestimating Gods don't do you favours, you should know that." 

Dan didn't utter a sound.

"Underestimating humans, well, I didn't think a mortal could wrap you around his frail finger."

Dan wanted to say something, he always had something to say to Achelous.

But now, words weren't his friends.

"Humans are prey. Sirens are predators. Mortals are weak. We are made of steel. Phil is nothing-"

"Don't talk about him like that!" Dan dared.

And Achelous' eyes narrowed to slits.

"I am a God. You are nothing compared to me." He said, voice colder than the currents flowing by, "Your precious human is rotting inside, he was meant to die the second you sang to him, drew him closer now- now look at you! You can't even look at me in the eye, can't even- useless, you're so _useless._ "

"I'm not-"

"You're not are you?" Achilles challenged, "Kill your human, prove your worth."

"No fuc-"

"You know what we do to the worthless." Achelous smirked, his expression alone sent chills down his spine.

"I-I don't care, I won't- I refuse- ah!"

Achelous pressed his index finger against his chest, watching the skin dry up even faster and crackle into sea foam.

"He will be in more pain knowing that you'll never return."

  
And those were the last words he heard from Achelous because ringing clouded his head, pain sparked everywhere- excruciating pain exploded through his chest where he was slowly dissolving.

 


	22. dissolve

Maybe pain was worth giving up Phil because Dan was sure he was slowly crumbling on the inside.

Instincts tried to take over, kill Phil- get this over with, he physically and mentally couldn't handle this sort of pain.

But he thought of Phil.

Phil.

Who's smile made Dan's day- no, week.

Who he killed his sister for.

Who he loved.

And he couldn't do that.

And when Phil greeted him on the shore, his face dropped and no, Dan never wanted to see him wear that expression.

"Da- Dan are you- oh my God-"

And Dan was falling apart.

Phil cupped his jaw and flinched back the second Dan started crumbling into his hands.

"What- why-"

Dan couldn't form a sentence, he simply looked up at Phil, the sea lapping at his knees, drawing his toes in, turning them into sea foam.

Phil shook his head, he couldn't afford to ask stupid questions.

"How do- how do we end this?"

Dan held his head up, collapsing in the sand at the mere effort.

"Fall with me."


	23. without

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyways listening to exo didn't set the mood at aLL

Phil didn't want to know what Dan meant.

But he did and Dan was indeed,

Falling,

Apart.

And he was taking Phil with him.

Phil didn't mind at all.

So Phil edged towards Dan, gently hooking his finger around his chin, to tilt his head up.

Trying not to break something so fragile.

"Let's go then."

But Dan was shaking his head, choking on panic because no, no, no Phil couldn't fall.

Because he lied, once Phil fell, he'd rise up.

He didn't want to rise up without Phil.

So he stayed there, heart ache adding to the pain. He raised a hand, clasping dissolving fingers around Phil's wrist.

Stay.

Don't leave.

Without _me_.

 

(Phil had never felt this scared so he looked away with tears clouding his vision).

 


	24. wake

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whOOPS MY HAND SLIPPED

Phil was a coward.

Fear followed him, one step a head or even by his side.

And nothing scared him more than death.

But he looked at Dan for the last time and he decided he wouldn't mind dying for Dan.

He knew Dan wouldn't mind dying for him because Dan kept whispering no, no, don't go-

So Phil took his hands and dragged him back to the sea, the waves stopped crashing upon them.

And his fate was decided because the sea foam was building Dan up again. He was growing stronger as Phil leant towards his doom.

Dan's eyes softened into misery because Phil didn't look fazed at all.

How was a human so afraid of himself be so accepting towards death?

And Dan tried to pull him back to the shore but every step he took back, he fell back down.

So Phil dragged him further in, until their shoulders were above the sea.

"Phil, no, I won't let you."

"Doesn't matter." And Phil's hand was still on his cheek.

"You can't-"

"It's what I'm destined to do."

But when Phil tried to dunk his head down, Dan pulled him back up and pulled him back towards the shore. Tears were streaming down his eyes, Phil could tell and soon he was crying too.

"You can't-"

"Listen to me!" Phil yelled, "You know I love you, right?"

Dan halted because no he didn't, he knew that he loved Phil, not the other way around- why did he have to make hard things harder?

"So let me do this for you."

"No-"

Phil leapt at him, pulling his hair forward until their lips connected. And it was messy, teeth clacked together, noses were wet but it didn't matter.

Because Dan was the one drowning.

Phil dragged him back, back into the sea, back to his doom because he loved Dan.

Dan decided this kiss was hypnotic because he couldn't flinch away, he was more than just paralysed.

He was mesmerised.

Hypnotised.

In love.

So when Phil kept walking back until his feet couldn't reach the ground, when the weight of Dan kept him from floating back up, when he started drowning, he still refused to let Dan go.

Phil wrapped an arm around Dan's back, another tangled in brown hair.

Dan didn't want to ever open his eyes, didn't ever want to see Phil die in his arms.

He wanted to pull him out, save Phil because that's all he's good for now.

It never happened because for once it was Dan who was caught in Phil's trap.

It was him who was so deep in fear and pleasure that he just collapsed into Phil.

He didn't know when Phil stopped kissing him but when he did open his eyes, Phil was limp in his arms.

Dans shook him because no, wake up, wake up, _wake up._

So Dan screamed, tried to kiss him awake, tried to pull him back to the shore and pump him back to life.

It was all his fault, his fault for listening, his fault for being so _goddamn helpless._

_Wake up._


	25. maybe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK SO LIKE I GET THAT YOU ALL HATE ME BUT LIKE, ITS NOT FINISHED YET IT DOESNT END LIKE THIS

Phil didn't wake up.

So Dan didn't leave.

He stayed there, skin peeling from the heat, from the sun, from the guilt.

From the pain of loss.

He had to go back at one point, when the heat started suffocating his breathing. He took Phil's limp body with him, carrying him through the seas, talking to him, kissing his pale cheek.

And he kept Phil, almost like a teddybear because he couldn't let go.

Phil isn't gone as long as he doesn't leave his arms.

He'll be next to him forever that way.

Fate doesn't favour sirens, he's learnt that the hard way because Phil's starting to rot and decay.

Not yet.

He couldn't leave yet.

And it stirred a ripple around them. Sirens told mermaids about him, mermaids told the dryads, dryads told the harpies and soon Poseidon found out.

It wasn't a big deal, the God of the Seas knowing about Dan- he couldn't care, he was focused on keeping Phil's limp head from falling off.

So Poseidon paid him a visit when he was wrapping seaweed around Phil's neck, trying to prop him back together.

"It's not forever." Poseidon started off.

Dan whipped around, clutching Phil tightly, almost breaking him.

"Huh?"

"It's not forever yet."

Dan blinked owlishly.

"When does forever end, Daniel?" Poseidon continue, prying Phil's body away from Dan. "Does it end now that Phil's gone? Does it end in another life? The life after? Does it never end? Even after the world has ended?"

Dan tried to grab Phil back because _he's mine, he's mine, get away from him._

"Forever doesn't exist."

"Maybe."

Poseidon floated away.

"Maybe it does."

Dan stopped moving.

"Phil is my forever."

"Maybe you'll find your forever again."

 


	26. forever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK LAST CHAPTER THIS THE EPILOGUE??????!!
> 
> so this is high key dedicated to BEN BC THNKS FOR SUPPORT!!!!!!

It was cold.

The pavement smelt like rain.

It was cold.

Dan buried his nose in his scarf.

His fingertips were almost blue.

So he shoved them in his pockets, along with his regret.

Who's idea was it to visit Greece in winter?

Louise, of course.

"Let's go to Greece this year, no? Next year? Fine, 2015."

She was made up of risk and delusion.

And tardiness.

Dan sighed and checked his watch, 10 minutes.

Louise was 10 minutes late.

He exhaled again, annoyance bleeding through the puff of air in front of his mouth.

He leaned against the wooden fence that separated the beach from the shops.

Dan stared at where the grey sky melded with the grey sea. He couldn't find the horizon.

But he could see the tall man crouched around the sand, building grey sandcastles.

Maybe he felt Dan's stare because he was looking up, eyes grey.

Translucent.

"It's cold." Dan said, mouth moving faster than his head.

Said man cocked his head. _And?_ his motion said.

"Aren't you cold?"

"Hmm. I guess."

And Dan was jumping over the fence, walking over to the sandcastle.

"Are you ok?"

"You're not from here. Are you?" The man went back to building his sandcastle. It was broken apart anyways, he was piling sand in random places.

Clumsy.

"Um. Tourist. I'm from England."

"Shouldn't you be used to the cold then?" he looked up and Dan almost stumbled back.

Familiar.

"I-I- what?"

"I said, shouldn't you be used to the cold then?"

"I- yeah but complaining about the weather- I'm British."

It was quiet again.

"Sorry but." Dan started and ended. The stranger looked up. "I feel like I know you."

He hummed out an "ok."

"Do you feel like you know me?"

"I don't know." He said. Dan watched his black hair fall into his eyes. He didn't seem bothered. "I don't know what you look like."

"What."

"Can't see."

"Huh."

"I'm blind."

He seemed annoyed.

Dan couldn't blame him.

"Oh! I'm sorry."

He didn't answer.

"Your voice is familiar, however."

"Oh?"

"Do you believe in soulmates?"

Dan flinched back in surprise. He slammed his hand down in the sand to settle himself, only to break apart the sand castle the man had been lazily building up.

He didn't notice.

"Soulmates? Listen, I don't even know your name-"

"Philip. You are?"

"Daniel- er- Dan is just fine."

"You didn't answer my question."

"I do believe in soulmates."

"Ok."

It was getting colder.

And quieter.

"Do you like the beach?" Dan asked after five minutes of silence.

"You're still here?" Philip jumped up slightly.

"Yeah, I, uh. I'm waiting for a friend. She's late."

"Maybe she showed up while you were here with me."

"Maybe."

"You should call her."

"I should."

He didn't.

It was quiet again until Philip realised he left a question unanswered.

"I like the beach. It's." He clenched his fist into the sand, "It's home."

"I like the beach when it's hot."

"It's crowded when it's hot."

"I still like it."

And there were sudden bursts of silence in midst their conversation. 

But Dan didn't leave.

He hoped Philip didn't want him to leave either.

It felt familiar, way too familiar.

The sound of crashing waves.

The feel of cold sand warming under his blue touch.

Philip.

"How long is forever?" Dan asked because it was dark now, he could feel goosebumps trailing over his neck and the cold ruffled up Philip's hair, ruffled up his sandcastle.

Philip looked up, eyes targeting Dan's at a startling accuracy.

Then he smiled.

It was warm.

 

(He had to leave at one point and Philip grabbed his wrist, desperate.

"Tomorrow, in the evening." Philip began, "I'll be making more sandcastles.")

 


End file.
